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Profile: NeatoMan

NeatoMan is, quite literally, a one-of-a-kind forum troll. That is to say, he typically only comments on one particular theme: The MM.

That’s pretty much it. Now, he’ll occasionally pop in to the random “thread at large” and put his two cents in, but he LIVES for MM threads.

Why? Well, because as best we can figure, he must be paid to do so. After all, in the face of literally 10’s of thousands of threads about how bad the MM is, how failed a mechanic it is, and how absolutely horrid it has been for years, NeatoMan is the only man to constantly and adamantly defend it.

It really is quite something. I mean, in our experience, he’s the only person that has ever constantly defended the MM in the face of all evidence that it needs work.

In fact, when someone actually suggested a complete rework to fix the MM, Neatoman had this to say:

View PostNeatoMan, on Jul 23 2016 – 15:22, said:

A complete redo will not fix this.

Really? So if they made a new MM from scratch to fix all the problems, it wouldn’t fix the problems. Gotcha. But his MM arguments don’t start there. In fact, the stupidity and lunacy just begins there. Feast your eyes on this argument:

View PostNeatoMan, on Jul 23 2016 – 15:22, said:

First of all 30-35% games are totally reasonable and do not lead to any more blowouts than balanced games.  Secondly, 30-35% games are usually not caused by large skill imbalances.

OK, so in other words, 65% to 70% of all games are totally unreasonable. That’s what you just said, shit for brains. If only 30% to 35% are reasonable, then that leaves the rest unreasonable. Yet, you don’t see that as a problem? You don’t see that as something that needs some work? Actually, a shitload of work?

Everybody else in the game thinks it does. In fact, many for years have been calling out for a reasonable, skill based MM. But you’re against that as well. Let’s take a look at why, shall we?

View PostNeatoMan, on Nov 29 2016 – 16:20, said:

Given the player skill distribution on the server where good players are less plentiful than bad players, the MM is far more likely to balance a good player by putting bad players on his team than it is to put another good player on the other.

No, dipshit. That’s your dumbassed idea. Skill based MM is EXACTLY THAT: SKILL BASED. It makes SURE that the talent is equal on both teams. So if it puts a 60% player on one team, the guy opposite him will be 60% as well. (+/- 1 to 2%)


There is no, “well, it’ll just throw all the skill on one team if it wants to” bullshit. That’s what it does NOW.

But wait! There’s more complete stupidity by this bought-and-paid-for asshat:

View PostNeatoMan, on Nov 29 2016 – 16:20, said:

Given 2 good players in queue, currently they randomly end up split evenly between teams, or two on the same team.   If they end up on one team when you balance them then one player is being moved to a worse team, or the other is getting a worse player to replace him.   The end result over time is both those good players end up with worse team mates than they would get in a random system.

Wrong again, dumbass. They GET THE SAME TEAMS. They’ll both have the SAME CHANCE TO WIN. What they will NOT get is what we have now where 4 of them are on one team up against NOBODY having any skill at all on the other.

Where does he get this shit? It simply defies any and all logic, and yet he’s got his little army of Wotlabs stat whore yes-men that follow him around agreeing with him. After all, they are the ones benefiting from the very system in place now, which is of course why the last thing on earth they want is a skill based MM to level the playing field.

Because if that happened, they’d be fighting each other and not the rank and file average players the vast majority of the time. And of course, playing against each other will hurt their precious stats, and they can’t let that happen now can they?

Now, just to be clear, let’s take a look at this “end-all-be-all” champion of the current MM:

Wow. Really? You’re going to talk about “bad” players and “worse” players being put on your team? Let’s take a look at his performance charts, shall we?

Wow. Dude. You’re on the express elevator to hell. That’s unfortunate. That must be that fantastic MM you love and protect so much giving you a fair deal, right?

Oh wait…sorry folks…there’s this:

View PostNeatoMan, on Oct 09 2016 – 19:27, said:

After going 70% yesterday, and seemingly unable to lose in my Mutz, I am now 30% playing the exact same tanks.  The change in my team mates is like night and day, and now I think I know how WG does it.

It’s not battle tiers, it’s not all goods vs all bads…  they put the player with the most team damage on the team they want to lose.  Yesterday the opposing teams had a number of TKers.  Today I got three games with TKers, and a few more with plain old griefers.  All it takes is one person to send your team into a tailspin.

You’ve got to be fucking kidding, right? YOU of ALL PEOPLE are NOW SAYING THE MM IS RIGGED?!?!




We wouldn’t have believed it if we hadn’t seen it with our own eyes. Check out Neatoman’s Crying Like a Bitch thread.

So after all his nay saying of everybody else, in the end, he cries about it being rigged.

And that, folks, is the typical hypocrisy of the entire Wotlabs crowd in action.


This Post Has 13 Comments

  1. Frau_Blooka

    LMFAO!!! Once again classic and comic gold guys! Well done!!!

    Thank you! We aim to please.

    – Thing 1

  2. treadhead00

    I would really like if WG could, at a minimum, get the current MM to work. When one team has twice as many heavys, they have an unfair advantage in HP. For the heavy deficient team to have a chance, it is to map dependent and requires a level of coordination that is lacking in pub battles. It is a thing of beauty though when a pub team gets its act together and pulls off the upset.

    Lately, the MM is simply off-the-hook bad. It’s beyond bad in fact. Now, according to more than a few people, they have the ability to change the MM at will to do anything they want, they simply refuse to do it.

    For instance, how long have people been begging to cap arty at 2 or 3 per side? They sit there and cry rivers that it can’t be done. Meanwhile, on their other game when people bitched about carriers, low and behold they INSTANTLY limit carriers to two per side. Poof. Done. Instantly.

    When people bitched about how hard it is for new players, Wargaming said in effect: tough shit. There’s nothing we an do. Over on their other game when people said the same thing they instantly make the tier spread +/-1 from T1 to T4. Poof. Done. Instantly.

    World of Tanks is run by a bunch of sadistic assholes that simply can’t admit they’re wrong. That’s why the game is the shit fest it is today and why so many people have simply given up playing it and moved on.

    – Thing 1

  3. Insurrectional_Leftist

    I sometimes think that we are the guinea pigs, or rather the test subjects that are like crash dummies left behind to be experimented on for the other games. Seriously, I’m not joking. It’s as if we are being subjected to some forum of a psychological test lab experiment, or some sort of controlled study of sorts. Being probed and studied under a controlled conditioned study? We are being told one thing, but being feed one thing entirely different in game. And just look what happens on the forum? Customer support is another controlled experiment, of misdirection, misinformation, or outright being told one thing, while their practicing something else completely.

    Meanwhile, come’s marching in the situation with the Match Maker. We keep getting these teenage kid arguments on the why there cannot be a skill based Match Maker, or even a hybrid forum of balanced Match Maker to stop the un-balanced blow out matches, with the uncontrollable long-Losing-streaks, or some way to moderate these de-stabilizing super-platooning, bombs being dropped on the Match Maker every single hour at different population levels.

    These constant missions being rigged up and down, with all these micro-patches being dropped in behind the scenes constantly making chances to the Match Maker making local adjustments according to missions parameters per server.

    Another issue is that the NA server does not show any reason to project growth beyond where it is now. Simply, creating new tank lines (ex: Swedish tanks) is simply a new motivator to keep veteran tankers grinding and spending money to free XP, money to hurry up and get the “Window Licking” swede tanks to hurry up and pad WN8 stats, while their OP, before the early nerfs come in, so they can be “Kewl” with their Wot Labs buddies. Outside of that, they will keep making more Perms to drag in as much money as they can.

    My point is, how are you going to keep the low tiers populated with more people coming in? It’s like college, you have to bring lots of people, because you’re going to lose so many people out of that initial freshman class after a while. Only so many are going to stay. Another words, there is a retention rate % of how many you keep?

    You know you’ve made a good post when you raise more questions than you can possibly answer.

    – Thing 1

  4. treadhead00

    Player loss is another topic that the shills adamently deny. I log on about the same time every day and I know the numbers are down roughly 20-25% from what they were 2-3 years ago.

    Actually, Gomez_Adams did a thread with all the math on that a few weeks ago on the WoT main forum. The decrease is actually 38% since 2013.

    – Thing 1

  5. Insurrectional_Leftist

    One of the top NA population “Deniers” is a shill called Striker_70. He will deny any claims that the NA population even came close to the published record of 64K for the peak amount at one time on the NA server just prior to Jan 2014. Wargaming published a News Announcement on the NA Forum in the news section which officially stated that claim with data. Most of us knew that already, even before that was published even that the population had in fact reached those levels. We knew the source to be correct when it was posted officially on the NA forum by Wargaming. It stayed there for a good while, and for several, several weeks the link was included in many threads which were made discussing the NA server population. It was rather plentiful in those threads. Well, it was sometime in the early summer time frame of this year I believe, some of us, had more discussions about this, and low an behold when we tried to access those threads, and the main news article, we discovered it was Gone!!

    Actually, all the threads, the news article with the 64K population were removed. Cherry picked clean, removed from the entire forum. Stricken from the NA forum no where to be found! During that posting period upon that thread suddenly Striker_70 shows up claiming, ha ha, I bet you can’t find your population threads, or your information anymore now. I dare you, just try!! LOL. That was his comment completely. I knew right then an there what had happened. A rat in Denmark had just crawled out of a hole! Striker_70 knew/ or had something to do with what was going on behind the scenes of how the threads vanished? All proof of the population discussions, hours of comments, post, threads, records, etc had been cherry picked, eradicated from the NA forum discussions. Wiped Clean. And from that point on ward Striker_70 runs around calling everyone “Liars”, Mis-information spreaders cause there is no proof to contradict his version of the concocted misinformation campaign he spins. Striker_70 has never even heard of a WG News Post which showed the peak NA population at 64K, he never saw any such threads of discussions, or links, or anything like that. All he knows is that everyone has no proof, he only knows that their memories are LIE’S, an his fabrications of fiction are the real McCoy. They are there to hurt the NA, by having a memory of the Truth, according to Striker_70.

    The Mad World of Stiker_70 never ends with the denials on the once growing NA population that seemed at one time to be going somewhere, which has become all to obvious to many now that it has shrunk to the size it has now. Yes, Striker_70 is your Go-To-Denier on population when it come’s to telling the masses when a ship is sinking as the rats are jumping, that no rat should jump, but go down with his ship while believing every word Striker_70 is telling you. It will only come to an end when Striker_70 stands alone on the NA server on the final day the server is shutdown, or finally merged with another server. And then he’ll still try to convince you he never said, or denied the population was static the whole time, or anything was ever wrong. ~sigh~

  6. FlorbFnarb

    Oh lol.

    This place takes the cake. No really, it’s hilarious. Sad that Neatoman always worked so hard to actually do the math and explain things to you people, but you desperately need to believe the game is rigged to make you lose.
    Kinda sad to see the fragile egos that can’t accept they might not be any good, but it is what it is.

    You could always put some effort in to learn how to play the game, but I suppose it’s easier to cry and pretend you’re being cheated.

    This coming from the moron that posted this:

    I’m fucking tired of the first couple matches being almost guaranteed losses. Last night, first two matches were losses. Today, first FOUR matches were losses. I randomly draw the weaker team four times in a row – first three were basically lost in the first sixty to ninety seconds, and only the fourth was even possible to win.


    Sell your crazy-assed hypocrisy someplace else, dipshit.

    – Thing 1

  7. PrinzEugen85

    Howdy Florb, did you get that crap box of yours to run WoT yet?

    LOL! I know, right?

    – Thing 1

  8. Insurrectional_Leftist


    Florby, He escaped again!! LOL.. 🙂 He’s on the rampage again. Good Ole Florb. He’s on a mission again, on a night Labs recon mission. The World of Florb.

  9. mp31b30q9

    This bag of shit I’ve asked around 10 times for him to link “proof” of WarGouging testing Skill Based Match Maker (SBMM) on any medium such as a test server, Supertesting etc.


    It’s the same ole regurgitated bullshit you would think he’s a fucking 9 year old. The sad part? He(?) claims to be a stat expert yet isn’t even remotely interested in finding/seeing data on SBMM tests allegedly conducted by WarGouging.

    It’s WarGouging “said so” with Repeatoman, oh just call him RepeatoMan as he repeats WarGouging talking points, that is his solo responsibility on the forums.

  10. Thing 1

    They all do that. They’re the first ones to yell “post proof” and when you do they then go off on the bullshit premise that it’s not statistically relevant.

    Right. Everybody should have to sink 5 years of their life and 35,000 games to find out it’s fucking bullshit.

    Most rational people can find that out in less than 100…which is why no new players are hanging around at all and haven’t been for years. The only new players Wargaming gets are stat whore rerolls.

  11. Insurrectional_Leftist

    So, someone let him out of his cage again when it come’s to another Match Maker thread once again. Like clock work here he is again. The defender of the Wargaming patent Software*, with why we are all wrong, wearing our tin foil hats. And why the whole community is full of shit, but him and Wargaming once again.

    You see Thing 1 why you and all the rest of us are so full of shit ? How does it feel to be full of shit, proven beyond a shadow of doubt by the great Neatoman?

    Or by his better known name, “RepeatoMan” …..

  12. Thing 1

    He’s a fucking douchebag.

  13. Insurrectional_Leftist

    I mean really, I just told him over there a few mins ago to take ownership for his BS, and his Sarcasm that he was caught with on the forum. RepeatoMan’s level for endless MM hipocrisy and dochebaggery deniel of the WG Patent riggery are inflamous!

    If the freeze dried him until after WWIII and they revived him, he would start defending the Wargaming MM patent software instantly. People would be stunned decades later. They would be like, “What’s a Wargaming MM Patent Software Match Maker?” 🙂

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